In the name of Allah,
"For every people (nation) there is a feast, and this is our feast (Eid). (Bukhari, Muslim)
Islam has removed the burden of celebrating anniversary, birthdays, etc. and simplified to celebrate two days of Eidain. Our religion, Islam, is so perfect that it provides celebration that does not require spending money, so poorest of the poorest can celebrate. All a person need is a clean piece of cloth, and a Muslim gathering nearby to perform the Eid Salat. Alhamdulilah!
I know that some of you are puzzled on what I just said. Eid being cheap and simple. It is true that we have made Eidain to be a very complicated and expensive affair. However, it is not meant to be such. I would like to share what to do and what NOT to do on Eid.
All men who cover their body, all women who cover their body and head, and all kids are required to attend Eid Salat, except menstruating women. Women who usually don't wear hijab are not required to come for Eid Salat. If someone is poor and can't afford to cover their body, we should try to provide for them. (Fardh)
Umm ‘Atiyyah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded us to bring them (women) out on (Eid) al-Fitr and (Eid) al-Adha, and to bring out adolescent girls, menstruating women and virgins, but the menstruating women were to stay away from the prayer, but were to witness goodness and the gathering of the Muslims. I said: “O Messenger of Allaah, what if one of us does not have a jilbaab?” He said: “Let her sister lend her a jilbab.” (Sahih Bukhari Book 8 #347)
No Salat should be performed immediately before or after Eid Salat. (Fardh)
The Prophet (sallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) went out and offered a two Rak’aat prayer on the Day of Eid-ul-Fitr and did not offer any other prayer before or after it and at that time Bilal (radiallahu ‘anhu) was accompanying him. (Bukhari Book 15, Number 104)
No speeches before salat. Two rakat followed by a speech, preferably in a language of the land, so people can understand. (Fardh).
Ibn Abbass (ra) reported: " I participated in the Eid-ul-Fitr prayer with the Messenger of Allah (saw), Abu Bakr (ra), Umar (ra) and Uthman (ra), and all of them held Eid prayer before Khutbah, and then the Prophet Muhammad (saw) delivered the Khutbah (sermon)." ( Muslim Book 004, Number 1923)
Imam to preach to women directly after Khutbah. (Recommended)
‘Ata (radiallahu ‘anhu) said, “Jabir bin ‘Abdullah said, ‘The Prophet went out on the Day of Eid-ul-Fitr and offered the prayer before delivering the khutba. ‘Ata told me that during the early days of Ibn Az-Zubair, Ibn Abbas had sent a message to him telling him that the Adhan for the ‘Id Prayer was never pronounced (in the life time of Allah’s Messenger) and the khutbah used to be delivered after the prayer. ‘Ata told me that Ibn Abbas and Jabir bin ‘Abdullah had said there was no Adhan for the prayer of Eid-ul-Fitr and Eid-ul-Aqha.’ ‘Ata said, “I heard Jabir bin ‘Abdullah saying, ‘The Prophet stood up and started with the prayer, and after it he delivered the khutbah. When the Prophet of Allah (sallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) finished (the khutbah), he went to the women and preached to them, while he was leaning on Bilal’s hand. Bilal was spreading his garment and the ladies were putting alms in it.’” I said to Ata, “Do you think it incumbent upon an Imam to go to the women and preach to them after finishing the prayer and Khutba?” ‘Ata’ said, “No doubt it is incumbent on Imams to do so, and why should they not do so?” (Bukhari Book 15, Number 78)
Men should wear the best of the clothes they have. It doesn't have to be new. So, no need for wasting money on new clothes every year. Perfume is must. (Fardh)
Al-Hassan as-Sibt says: "The Messenger of Allah (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) ordered us to wear the best clothes we could find for the two 'ids and to apply the best perfume we could find and to sacrifice the best animal we could find." This is related by al-Hakim and in its chain is Ishaq ibn Barzakh whom al-'Azdi declares to be weak while Ibn Hibban says he is trustworthy.
Women, however, can not dress up attractively when they come for Eid salat, and they have to be covered. (Fardh)
Aisha (RA) reports that Allah's Apostle used to offer the Fajr prayer and some believing women covered with their veiling sheets used to attend the Fajr prayer with him and then they would return to their homes unrecognized (Bukhari Book 8, Number 368).
Women should not use perfume when coming for Eid. (Fardh)
Zainub (RA), the wife of Abdullah bin Masood (RA), reports that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said: "If any woman attends the Masjid, she should not use any perfume" (Muslim Book 004, Number 0893)
Women should not adorned themselves with makeup, jewelery, cloths etc. (Fardh)
It is reported that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) was in the Masjid when a woman from the people of Muzaina who had adorned herself came into the Masjid. Upon this Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said: “O People, prevent your women from wearing attractive garments and walking proudly in the Masjid since the people of Bani Israeel were cursed because of this very action of their women (Ibn Majah)
We should try to avoid contacts with Non-Mahram men or women. This is a general rule that does not change for Eid. Physical contact like shaking hands is haram, and unnecessary conversation should be discouraged. (Recommended)
Malik related to me from Muhammad ibn al-Munkadir that Umayma bint Ruqayqa said, "I went to the Messenger of Allah with the women who took an oath of allegiance with him in Islam. They said, 'Messenger of Allah! We take a pledge with you not to associate anything with Allah, not to steal, not to commit adultery, not to kill our children, nor to produce any lie that we have devised between our hands and feet, and not to disobey you in what is known.' The Messenger of Allah said, 'In what you can do and are able.' "
Umayma continued, "They said, 'Allah and His Messenger are more merciful to us than ourselves. Come, let us give our hands to you, Messenger of Allah!' The Messenger of Allah said, 'I do not shake hands with women. My word to a hundred women is like my word to one woman.' "(Muwatta Book 55, Number 55.1.2)
Eat dates before Salat (Suggested)
Allah’s Messenger (sallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) never proceeded (for the prayer) on the Day of Eid-ul-Fitr unless he had eaten some dates. Anas (radiallahu ‘anhu) also narrated: The Prophet (sallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) used to eat odd number of dates. (Bukhari 2.73)
Return from a different path. No need to go crazy looking for a complete different path, just change as much as you can. (Suggested)
On the Day of Eid the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) used to return (after offering the Eid prayer) through a way different from that by which he went. (Bukhari Book 15, Number 102)
A struggling Muslim